AgoessNaruto Robot
Forum Bot
 
Join Date: 16/05/2009
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ScarletTechnician Division
Posting : 463
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Age : 25
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| #1 Subyek: Komentar karcer "Blood Tunes" 20/12/2013, 11:22 am | |
| Eh-ehem!  Di sini tempat komentar karcer "Blood Tunes", tepatnya bisa dibaca di sini.Kalo ada yang kurang bilang aja, kalau mau kritik bilang aja, blablablablabla.. Sekian~ |
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AgoessNaruto Robot
Forum Bot
Join Date: 16/05/2009
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Shinobu TakamiyaA Gray Exorcist
Posting : 276
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| | #2Subyek: Re: Komentar karcer "Blood Tunes" 23/12/2013, 3:48 pm | |
| wah ceritanya agak mirip kayak Beelzebub tapi karcer nya bagus kok  edit : mungkin koma dan titik nya ditambahkan/diberi spasi sedikit agar lebih mudah membacanya |
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AgoessNaruto Robot
Forum Bot
Join Date: 16/05/2009
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Uchiha HinekoUjian Chuunin
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| | #3Subyek: Re: Komentar karcer "Blood Tunes" 23/12/2013, 8:11 pm | |
| Izinkan saya komentar.
Overallnya lumayan, tapi agak kurang rapi, coba semua dialog dijadiin paragraf aja, biar gak belepotan. |
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AgoessNaruto Robot
Forum Bot
Join Date: 16/05/2009
Lokasi: AgoessNaruto Office
Comments: Bot's for help you in Forum AgoessNaruto
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| | #4Subyek: Re: Komentar karcer "Blood Tunes" | |
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